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A royal flush is better than a full house. Turned on the radio to hear "Shallow". I'm not a fan so switched stations and got "Bad Romance".

I also don't like that so tried a third station and got "Poker Face". It seems that, all I hear is radio Gaga. Why does the Queen take bathroom breaks during a poker game?

To make a royal flush. A guy gets home late, his wife says where have you been it's 3. It's not your house anymore either.

The invisible man, the wolf man, and Dracula played poker. They tried to get the mummy to play but he had no skin in the game.

The invisible man tried to bluff but people saw right through him. Dracula ended up bleeding them dry, leaving the wolf man howling mad.

I like to think of the act of pooping like a game of poker You go all in with a royal flush. Poker is like sex If you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand Edit 1: when you cheat in poker you have a partner Edit 2: this is getting more upvotes than I thought it would get but before someone calls me out on it.

This was a Mae West quote about bridge and several Internet memes pu Why do so many deadbeat dads love to play poker? God calls Satan. Been doing a wonderful job.

We finally got an AC system up and running and the heaters are fixed. He even designed an auto-poker for the pitchfork teams.

A holy man was feeling distraught one morning, so he sat alone in his church praying to God for guidance It had started innocently enough, but the priest was getting carried away and the guilt was finally getting A poker player wins one million dollars first price in a tournament Interviewer: Congratulations on your win!

Poker player: I owe some people some money so I will be paying my debt to these guys. Interviewer: and what about the rest?

Poker player: Well I guess they'll ha Why was the origami master so bad at poker? Because they folded every hand.

A man and his wife visit Las Vegas for their 15th anniversary. Being the spontaneous couple they always have been the husband decides that their first night he will do all the planning.

They go out a fancy steak dinner and he pays extra to have the band sing their wedding song tableside and serenade his wife.

She melts. He then takes her to a magic show and pays extra to have her involved in the main act as the woman who disappears within the act. She is beaming with joy.

Where sex is like poker You either want to have a good partner, or a good hand. Last night I played Origami poker Things were going great, until I had to fold.

Which deck of cards does Professor Oak use for his poker games? His poker decks. I asked the caveman if he wanted to play poker He said: "Deal, me in!

You never want to play poker with Vlad the Impaler A lot is at stake. What do a woman and a bar have in common?

Liquor in the front, poker in the back. When does a strip poker game start getting good? When somebody's got a big pair showin'.

You said that after the hot poker came the pliers pulling out your toenails, but each time you start to tell us the final torture, you break down.

I've just opened a casino for dogs. They can play roulette, poker and blackjack all under one roof! I play poker with my best friend's wife every weekend.

He seems fine with it, but I suspect he doesn't know what I use to poke her. Which piano player is the most predictable poker player?

Ben Folds. Poker Night. John is playing poker with his friends in Peter's house. But Peter's 5 yrs old son disturbs them by running around looking at their cards and shouting it.

So John took the boy in the room for five minutes. After that they played the game smoothly without any distraction.

So Peter got curious. Wandering through the hot desert, a youthful looking man comes upon a tent. Intrigued, he ventures inside Behind the table, grinning ear to ear, is the proprietor.

Only five shekels. Keep track of which cup has the bean under it and win double. Doug was playing poker with some friends As the night went on, he noticed the mood at the table was getting tense, so he decided to lighten the atmosphere a bit.

As the next round started, and everyone else put their ante chips in, Doug reached into the snack tray and tossed a handful of potato chips into the pot.

Dave is playing poker at friends house with a group of mates. As the game progresses, the urge to unload his bowels becomes overwhelming. Deciding he can't hold on any longer, he runs to the toilet, mid hand, to take a dump.

After unloading a poop King Kong would be proud of, he flushes the toilet, it won't stop going! Filthy poo water starts pouring o Growing up I always heard life is like a game of poker I refuse to play poker with my friend because he has a tattoo of Jim Carrey from on his forearm.

He's always got an ace up his sleeve. My wife says she is going to divorce me because I love poker more then her.

In the land of poker, different people had different toilets. The peasants had toilets that flushed clockwise, and the nobles had toilets that flushed counterclockwise.

The king had neither. He had a straight flush. Why should you never play poker with a crocodile? You will lose every hand.

My wife said she'll leave me if I don't overcome my poker addiction but I think she's bluffing. This guy went to play poker with his buddies After a while, it started pouring outside, thunderstorm and what not.

The guy, who walked there, asked his friend - how will I get home now? His friend's wife tells him it's not a problem, he should just spend the night there and go straight to work the next day.

The friend and his wife get ready to Why wouldn't the Baker play poker with the tall Butcher? The stakes were too high. Why did the short carnivore hate poker?

Because the steaks were too high. Why do Australians always confuse poker with chess? Because they go "Check My husband cheats and he beats me.

I don't want to play poker with him anymore. God it's annoying playing poker with Jesus Guy raises on the river every damn time. Bill had finally had it with his wife I just lost you to Frank in a Poker game.

How I became famous at a hospital during a surgery. So to give some background information. I was 12 years old at the time and at Emory Hospital in Atlanta, Georgia.

The reason why was so I could get a tumor out of my eyeball, which was usually a sign of cancer in people in their 50ss, not when they are So when I was in the waiting room for my What's your favorite part of playing strip poker?

The stripping or the poking? Why did the jaguars stop playing poker at the safari? Because all the others were cheetahs.

Jesus and Lazarus are playing poker. Jesus says I'll see you and I'll raise you. I also don't like that so tried a third station and got "Poker Face".

It seems that, all I hear is radio Gaga. Why does the Queen take bathroom breaks during a poker game? To make a royal flush. A guy gets home late, his wife says where have you been it's 3.

It's not your house anymore either. The invisible man, the wolf man, and Dracula played poker. They tried to get the mummy to play but he had no skin in the game.

The invisible man tried to bluff but people saw right through him. Dracula ended up bleeding them dry, leaving the wolf man howling mad. I like to think of the act of pooping like a game of poker You go all in with a royal flush.

Poker is like sex If you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand Edit 1: when you cheat in poker you have a partner Edit 2: this is getting more upvotes than I thought it would get but before someone calls me out on it.

This was a Mae West quote about bridge and several Internet memes pu Why do so many deadbeat dads love to play poker?

God calls Satan. Been doing a wonderful job. We finally got an AC system up and running and the heaters are fixed. He even designed an auto-poker for the pitchfork teams.

A holy man was feeling distraught one morning, so he sat alone in his church praying to God for guidance It had started innocently enough, but the priest was getting carried away and the guilt was finally getting A poker player wins one million dollars first price in a tournament Interviewer: Congratulations on your win!

Poker player: I owe some people some money so I will be paying my debt to these guys. Interviewer: and what about the rest?

Poker player: Well I guess they'll ha Why was the origami master so bad at poker? Because they folded every hand. A man and his wife visit Las Vegas for their 15th anniversary.

Being the spontaneous couple they always have been the husband decides that their first night he will do all the planning. They go out a fancy steak dinner and he pays extra to have the band sing their wedding song tableside and serenade his wife.

She melts. He then takes her to a magic show and pays extra to have her involved in the main act as the woman who disappears within the act.

She is beaming with joy. Where sex is like poker You either want to have a good partner, or a good hand. Last night I played Origami poker Things were going great, until I had to fold.

Which deck of cards does Professor Oak use for his poker games? His poker decks. I asked the caveman if he wanted to play poker He said: "Deal, me in!

You never want to play poker with Vlad the Impaler A lot is at stake. What do a woman and a bar have in common?

Liquor in the front, poker in the back. When does a strip poker game start getting good? When somebody's got a big pair showin'.

You said that after the hot poker came the pliers pulling out your toenails, but each time you start to tell us the final torture, you break down.

I've just opened a casino for dogs. They can play roulette, poker and blackjack all under one roof! I play poker with my best friend's wife every weekend.

He seems fine with it, but I suspect he doesn't know what I use to poke her. Which piano player is the most predictable poker player?

Ben Folds. Poker Night. John is playing poker with his friends in Peter's house. But Peter's 5 yrs old son disturbs them by running around looking at their cards and shouting it.

So John took the boy in the room for five minutes. After that they played the game smoothly without any distraction. So Peter got curious.

Wandering through the hot desert, a youthful looking man comes upon a tent. Intrigued, he ventures inside Behind the table, grinning ear to ear, is the proprietor.

Only five shekels. Keep track of which cup has the bean under it and win double. Doug was playing poker with some friends As the night went on, he noticed the mood at the table was getting tense, so he decided to lighten the atmosphere a bit.

As the next round started, and everyone else put their ante chips in, Doug reached into the snack tray and tossed a handful of potato chips into the pot.

Dave is playing poker at friends house with a group of mates. As the game progresses, the urge to unload his bowels becomes overwhelming.

Deciding he can't hold on any longer, he runs to the toilet, mid hand, to take a dump. After unloading a poop King Kong would be proud of, he flushes the toilet, it won't stop going!

Filthy poo water starts pouring o Growing up I always heard life is like a game of poker I refuse to play poker with my friend because he has a tattoo of Jim Carrey from on his forearm.

He's always got an ace up his sleeve. My wife says she is going to divorce me because I love poker more then her.

In the land of poker, different people had different toilets. The peasants had toilets that flushed clockwise, and the nobles had toilets that flushed counterclockwise.

The king had neither. He had a straight flush. Why should you never play poker with a crocodile? You will lose every hand.

My wife said she'll leave me if I don't overcome my poker addiction but I think she's bluffing. This guy went to play poker with his buddies After a while, it started pouring outside, thunderstorm and what not.

The guy, who walked there, asked his friend - how will I get home now? His friend's wife tells him it's not a problem, he should just spend the night there and go straight to work the next day.

The friend and his wife get ready to Why wouldn't the Baker play poker with the tall Butcher? The stakes were too high. Why did the short carnivore hate poker?

Because the steaks were too high. Why do Australians always confuse poker with chess? Because they go "Check My husband cheats and he beats me.

I don't want to play poker with him anymore. God it's annoying playing poker with Jesus Guy raises on the river every damn time.

Bill had finally had it with his wife I just lost you to Frank in a Poker game. How I became famous at a hospital during a surgery.

So to give some background information. I was 12 years old at the time and at Emory Hospital in Atlanta, Georgia. The reason why was so I could get a tumor out of my eyeball, which was usually a sign of cancer in people in their 50ss, not when they are So when I was in the waiting room for my What's your favorite part of playing strip poker?

The stripping or the poking? Why did the jaguars stop playing poker at the safari? Because all the others were cheetahs.

Jesus and Lazarus are playing poker. Jesus says I'll see you and I'll raise you. A man came home from a poker game A man came home from a poker game late one night and found his hideous harpy of a wife waiting for him with a rolling pin.

What did the orphan poker player say?

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Why should you never play poker in Africa? Because there are so many cheetahs! A royal flush is better than a full house. Turned on the radio to hear "Shallow".

I'm not a fan so switched stations and got "Bad Romance". I also don't like that so tried a third station and got "Poker Face".

It seems that, all I hear is radio Gaga. Why does the Queen take bathroom breaks during a poker game? To make a royal flush. A guy gets home late, his wife says where have you been it's 3.

It's not your house anymore either. The invisible man, the wolf man, and Dracula played poker. They tried to get the mummy to play but he had no skin in the game.

The invisible man tried to bluff but people saw right through him. Dracula ended up bleeding them dry, leaving the wolf man howling mad.

I like to think of the act of pooping like a game of poker You go all in with a royal flush. Poker is like sex If you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand Edit 1: when you cheat in poker you have a partner Edit 2: this is getting more upvotes than I thought it would get but before someone calls me out on it.

This was a Mae West quote about bridge and several Internet memes pu Why do so many deadbeat dads love to play poker?

God calls Satan. Been doing a wonderful job. We finally got an AC system up and running and the heaters are fixed.

He even designed an auto-poker for the pitchfork teams. A holy man was feeling distraught one morning, so he sat alone in his church praying to God for guidance It had started innocently enough, but the priest was getting carried away and the guilt was finally getting A poker player wins one million dollars first price in a tournament Interviewer: Congratulations on your win!

Poker player: I owe some people some money so I will be paying my debt to these guys. Interviewer: and what about the rest?

Poker player: Well I guess they'll ha Why was the origami master so bad at poker? Because they folded every hand. A man and his wife visit Las Vegas for their 15th anniversary.

Being the spontaneous couple they always have been the husband decides that their first night he will do all the planning.

They go out a fancy steak dinner and he pays extra to have the band sing their wedding song tableside and serenade his wife.

She melts. He then takes her to a magic show and pays extra to have her involved in the main act as the woman who disappears within the act.

She is beaming with joy. Where sex is like poker You either want to have a good partner, or a good hand. Last night I played Origami poker Things were going great, until I had to fold.

Which deck of cards does Professor Oak use for his poker games? His poker decks. I asked the caveman if he wanted to play poker He said: "Deal, me in!

You never want to play poker with Vlad the Impaler A lot is at stake. What do a woman and a bar have in common? Liquor in the front, poker in the back.

When does a strip poker game start getting good? When somebody's got a big pair showin'. You said that after the hot poker came the pliers pulling out your toenails, but each time you start to tell us the final torture, you break down.

I've just opened a casino for dogs. They can play roulette, poker and blackjack all under one roof! I play poker with my best friend's wife every weekend.

He seems fine with it, but I suspect he doesn't know what I use to poke her. Which piano player is the most predictable poker player? Ben Folds.

Poker Night. John is playing poker with his friends in Peter's house. But Peter's 5 yrs old son disturbs them by running around looking at their cards and shouting it.

So John took the boy in the room for five minutes. After that they played the game smoothly without any distraction.

So Peter got curious. Wandering through the hot desert, a youthful looking man comes upon a tent. Intrigued, he ventures inside Behind the table, grinning ear to ear, is the proprietor.

Only five shekels. Keep track of which cup has the bean under it and win double. Doug was playing poker with some friends As the night went on, he noticed the mood at the table was getting tense, so he decided to lighten the atmosphere a bit.

As the next round started, and everyone else put their ante chips in, Doug reached into the snack tray and tossed a handful of potato chips into the pot.

Dave is playing poker at friends house with a group of mates. As the game progresses, the urge to unload his bowels becomes overwhelming.

Deciding he can't hold on any longer, he runs to the toilet, mid hand, to take a dump. After unloading a poop King Kong would be proud of, he flushes the toilet, it won't stop going!

Filthy poo water starts pouring o Growing up I always heard life is like a game of poker I refuse to play poker with my friend because he has a tattoo of Jim Carrey from on his forearm.

He's always got an ace up his sleeve. My wife says she is going to divorce me because I love poker more then her. In the land of poker, different people had different toilets.

The peasants had toilets that flushed clockwise, and the nobles had toilets that flushed counterclockwise.

The king had neither. He had a straight flush. Why should you never play poker with a crocodile? You will lose every hand.

My wife said she'll leave me if I don't overcome my poker addiction but I think she's bluffing. This guy went to play poker with his buddies After a while, it started pouring outside, thunderstorm and what not.

The guy, who walked there, asked his friend - how will I get home now? His friend's wife tells him it's not a problem, he should just spend the night there and go straight to work the next day.

The friend and his wife get ready to Why wouldn't the Baker play poker with the tall Butcher? The stakes were too high.

Why did the short carnivore hate poker? Because the steaks were too high. Why do Australians always confuse poker with chess? Because they go "Check My husband cheats and he beats me.

I don't want to play poker with him anymore. God it's annoying playing poker with Jesus Guy raises on the river every damn time.

Bill had finally had it with his wife I just lost you to Frank in a Poker game. How I became famous at a hospital during a surgery.

So to give some background information. I was 12 years old at the time and at Emory Hospital in Atlanta, Georgia. The reason why was so I could get a tumor out of my eyeball, which was usually a sign of cancer in people in their 50ss, not when they are So when I was in the waiting room for my What's your favorite part of playing strip poker?

The stripping or the poking? Why did the jaguars stop playing poker at the safari? Because all the others were cheetahs. Jesus and Lazarus are playing poker.

She told him the Why shouldn't you play poker with really fat people? Because they're going to fold a lot.

What do you call a poker player that is also a doctor? A cardiologist. What does playing poker and sleeping with women have in common?

A pair of 9's is pretty good. But four 2's will beat it. Why don't they play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs!

Why do Poker players only use analog clocks? It helps them practice reading hands. I hate playing poker in the jungle They're all a bunch of cheetahs.

Poker Yesterday I played poker with a deck of Tarot Cards. I got a full house and four people died. Queen Elizabeth only plays poker on the toilet.

That's because she's guaranteed a royal flush. What did the poker player do with the last piece of toilet paper? Marriage is like a game of poker At first you have two hearts and a diamond By the end all you want is a club and spade.

Showing respect for their fallen comrade, the other five complete their playing time standing up. Sam looks around and asks, "Now, who is going to tell the wife?

Lester, who is always a loser, picks the short one. They tell him to be discreet, be gentle, don't I came across a poker table that had playing cards made of cast iron.

I asked the person who was handing out the cards to the players if they made the cards themselves, but they kept saying in the most poetic way that it wasn't them, because that would be illegal.

I think they're lying; whoever smelt it dealt it, whoever did the rhyme did the crime, and whoever Gay Poker A new card game.

Where Queens are wild and straights don't count. Lifter legs and poker Just three parts of a wood stove, you dirty dog you!

Decided to eat some chips yesterday Apparently that's "super weird" and "completely inappropriate at a poker game". Joined a poker club Just signed up for poker at a club and all the members have these "lucky charms" on the table this guy has a glass cube with a 4 leaf clover in it that girl has a mini bronze doggie statue, you get the point.

So the next week I wanted bring a charm to fit in, but I forgot but the novelty store next Two couples were playing poker one evening.

Dave accidentally dropped some cards on the floor. When he bent down under the table to pick them up, he noticed Frank's wife, Sue wasn't wearing any underwear under her dress!

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He sees a group of rough rider lookin' scoundrels playing poker and he musters up enough courage to sit down with 'em thinkin' he might get a story out if he was lucky.

I was playing poker with my friends. Dunno why they got so mad at me. I was just eating chips. Do you know why poker players can't have tattoos with words?

Because the others could read them like a book. A priest, a rabbi and a buddhist monk get arrested for illegal gaming They get in front of the judge.

He starts questioning the priest first. I didn't believe my wife would win at poker Then I saw her ace. Why should you never play poker in Africa?

Because there are so many cheetahs! A royal flush is better than a full house. Turned on the radio to hear "Shallow".

I'm not a fan so switched stations and got "Bad Romance". I also don't like that so tried a third station and got "Poker Face".

It seems that, all I hear is radio Gaga. Why does the Queen take bathroom breaks during a poker game? To make a royal flush. A guy gets home late, his wife says where have you been it's 3.

It's not your house anymore either. The invisible man, the wolf man, and Dracula played poker. They tried to get the mummy to play but he had no skin in the game.

The invisible man tried to bluff but people saw right through him. Dracula ended up bleeding them dry, leaving the wolf man howling mad.

I like to think of the act of pooping like a game of poker You go all in with a royal flush. Poker is like sex If you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand Edit 1: when you cheat in poker you have a partner Edit 2: this is getting more upvotes than I thought it would get but before someone calls me out on it.

This was a Mae West quote about bridge and several Internet memes pu Why do so many deadbeat dads love to play poker?

God calls Satan. Been doing a wonderful job. We finally got an AC system up and running and the heaters are fixed. He even designed an auto-poker for the pitchfork teams.

A holy man was feeling distraught one morning, so he sat alone in his church praying to God for guidance It had started innocently enough, but the priest was getting carried away and the guilt was finally getting A poker player wins one million dollars first price in a tournament Interviewer: Congratulations on your win!

Poker player: I owe some people some money so I will be paying my debt to these guys. Interviewer: and what about the rest? Poker player: Well I guess they'll ha Why was the origami master so bad at poker?

Because they folded every hand. A man and his wife visit Las Vegas for their 15th anniversary. Being the spontaneous couple they always have been the husband decides that their first night he will do all the planning.

They go out a fancy steak dinner and he pays extra to have the band sing their wedding song tableside and serenade his wife.

She melts. He then takes her to a magic show and pays extra to have her involved in the main act as the woman who disappears within the act.

She is beaming with joy. Where sex is like poker You either want to have a good partner, or a good hand. Last night I played Origami poker Things were going great, until I had to fold.

Which deck of cards does Professor Oak use for his poker games? His poker decks. I asked the caveman if he wanted to play poker He said: "Deal, me in!

You never want to play poker with Vlad the Impaler A lot is at stake. What do a woman and a bar have in common?

Liquor in the front, poker in the back. When does a strip poker game start getting good? When somebody's got a big pair showin'.

You said that after the hot poker came the pliers pulling out your toenails, but each time you start to tell us the final torture, you break down.

I've just opened a casino for dogs. They can play roulette, poker and blackjack all under one roof! I play poker with my best friend's wife every weekend.

He seems fine with it, but I suspect he doesn't know what I use to poke her. Which piano player is the most predictable poker player?

Ben Folds. Poker Night. John is playing poker with his friends in Peter's house. But Peter's 5 yrs old son disturbs them by running around looking at their cards and shouting it.

So John took the boy in the room for five minutes.

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